United States Prepares for a NEW Decade of War in Asia

Here's the GOOD News, sports fans: The United States is engaged in the LONGEST WAR in its 234-year history in Afghanistan, one that will begin its eleventh calendar year in two weeks. Like the Vietnam War, in which I was grateful for our "Fuehrer" for permitting me to put my jackboots, only slightly scuffed by my father for Adolf Hitler to good use, I look forward to more war on our otherwise dreary planet: It's a tradition for our family. My father served with the NAZI army in northern Italy, but the British who incarcerated him in their torture center called Erbiseoul lacked a sense of humor, and fired on their prisoners with their combat rifles while the German soldiers tried to relieve themselves of their feces, but ended up slipping into that horrible mess and drowning miserably. But, I digress, and after all, my combat experience in Banmethuot, Kontum, and the "Iron Triangle" was, really, really, a lot of fun. By returning enemy mortar fire from my base in Trung Lap, I was able to kill a little tiny boy, whose stomach had been thoroughly perforated by my mortar fire. But I digress again: "Roughly 100,000 US troops and over half as many more from Washington's North Atlantic Treaty Organization and partners are waging an armed conflict this year that has resulted in an increasing number of civilian casualties and the most deaths among belligerents on both sides, since it began on October 7, 2001. US and NATO war dead this year are approaching the 700 mark, nearly a third of the total for the over nine-year-old war.